So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize