There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
