Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
