We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
