Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize