Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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