Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
