I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
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