i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
