I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
