I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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