How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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