He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
