they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize