that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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