I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
