PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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