Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
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