If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
