dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
