oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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