the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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