Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
