...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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