put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We don't watch enough power rangers
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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