I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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