I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
