...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Best friends brother. Beat that.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Randomize
