So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
