how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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