I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
