in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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