toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Randomize
