Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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