i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
