if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
