I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I look better un-naked...
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
