He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
