Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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