ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
