Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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