at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
