I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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