A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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