just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
