laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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