I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
