I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
