No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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