So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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